Tuesday, November 23, 2010

It's just a shirt

So, last night I was folding laundry and got teary-eyed over a shirt. Jack's favorite shirt. He insisted on wearing it one day last week though it was way too cold and the shirt's too small. In fact, it was probably the last time he'd get to wear it. This shirt's seen many, MANY trips to the museum, park, zoo, school, and birthday parties. Lots of mud pies and bike rides, picnics and playdates. For months if the shirt was clean, Jack picked it out. I got to a point where I had to hide it from time to time so folks at school wouldn't think that Jack only had the one shirt.

Drove me crazy.

And now, I'm sad to see it go.

My boy is growing up. Really, really growing up.

And now I'm crying.

I just can't believe that only five short years ago he was nestled in my tummy. We didn't even know he was a "he" just yet. We were marveling in the moment. At the same time we were wishing time away.

Hurry up and get through the pregnancy. Then hurry up and sleep through the night (that took a LONG time). Then hurry up and start school. Then hurry up and get potty trained (that could've come a bit sooner). Then hurry up and... and... and...

Can we STOP now?!

Right now my little man's at school, enjoying his last day before Thanksgiving break. Will we wish the next month away in anticipation of Christmas? And then count the days till his birthday? And then summer?

Yes. Because that's just what we do.

I just want to slow it down. While folding that shirt last night it dawned on me that he'd be in kindergarten next year. KINDERGARTEN! He'll be away from me five days a week.

Oh, this is physically painful for me to imagine!

I just can't fathom a day when he's in middle school and is embarrassed to be seen with me. I'm sure that won't happen because I'm unbelievably cool, but still. He's going to be a grown up man and he's going to leave. Ouch.

Am I sad. Yep. Am I excited. Absolutely. I know the Lord has a plan for my little boy and I can't wait to see what his future holds.

I prayed for this child, and the LORD has granted me what I asked of him. So now I give him to the LORD. For his whole life he will be given over to the LORD.” And he worshiped the LORD there. 1 Samuel 1:27-28

For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD, “plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future. Jeremiah 29:11